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I feel as if every time I try and say how I feel, I am just pushed back into the fear of losing you and everything we have worked for. I love you so much. You left me once and I am terrified I am going to mess things up and lose you again. My insecurities are going to be the down fall of my life.

I want to be more than sex,
meaningless sex.

This is me envious
as I write her name on a mug
and smash it against the wall.

This is me selfish
with my hands around your wrists.

This is me lonely
ever-flowing, irrational, leech.

This is me angry.
This is me drama queen.
This is me greedy, always needy.
Open bones, endless questions,
chocolate-dipped anxiety.

This is me desperate,
this is me starving.
Poisonous disease -
This is me wanting
more, more, and always more.

Now -

Will you touch me?
Do you still want to?

Sade Andria Zabala (surfandwrite) | Should We Take It To The Next Level? (via surfandwrite)
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